You are allowed to have boundaries

You are allowed to have boundaries (Episode 33) Whether you’re a beginner or a seasoned pro when it comes to boundaries, it’s easy to believe that boundaries are great in every situation...except maybe not when you are a parent or caregiver. Because when the lives of your care receivers are at stake, you’re going to have to meet everybody’s needs no matter what it costs you. Right? Well, not...

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Why it’s so hard to let people help

Why it's so hard to let people help (Episode 32) Why in the world is it so hard to let people help us? Rejecting help when people offer it is a habit that drains us of precious energy, time, sleep and so many other critical things. In this episode, Kay Coughlin reveals some common reasons we struggle with this, talks about how to heal from it so we can be mentally and physically healthy, and...

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Human Giver Syndrome

Human Giver Syndrome (Episode 31) Human Giver Syndrome is the belief that some people (the givers) are supposed to exist to put all of their energy into creating comfort and success for other people, and to be attractive and available, physically and emotionally, at all times while doing it. In this episode, Kay Coughlin talks about how this syndrome can afflict anybody (especially family...

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Human Giver Syndrome

How to Feel Better as a Caregiver

How to Feel Better as a Caregiver (Episode 30) In this episode, Kay Coughlin talks about how to feel better as a family caregiver right away. It might surprise you, because it doesn’t require a lot of time or energy, and it doesn’t rely on making any changes to your life or your situation. You don’t even have to tell anybody that you are doing it. All you need is courage and a little bit of...

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How to Feel Better as a Caregiver

It’s OK to want to be seen

It's OK to want to be seen for who you are (Episode 29) In this episode, Kay Coughlin talks about another radical idea: that it’s OK for caregivers to have identities and lives that don’t revolve around our role as caregivers. Kay explains that it’s normal and healthy to have individual needs and desires - and why it can be so hard to do that it seems laughable or even impossible. But it is...

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Yes, it’s hard to decide where to start

It's hard to decide where to start (Episode 28) In this episode, Kay Coughlin talks about why the overwhelming experience of being a caregiver can keep you stuck, unable to make changes to situations, relationships, beliefs and emotions. The good news is that you don’t have to change everything all at once. You can choose just one starting point. Kay reminds us we all have permission to be...

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Yes, it’s hard to decide where to start

What if judgment had no power over you?

What if judgment had no power over you? (Episode 27) Can you imagine what your life might look like if the judgment all around you wasn’t such a big deal?  Judgment is really a big and painful part of life as a family caregiver, and of course it’s all around us in all areas of our lives because we’re humans. It’s what humans do. It doesn’t make us bad people, it just means we are normal. On...

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What if judgment had no power over you?

The story family caregivers are “supposed to” step into, even if they feel trapped by it

The story family caregivers are "supposed to" live (Episode 26) There are powerful stereotypes that family caregivers inherit when we agree to become caregivers. These stereotypes exist whether or not we know it - and certainly, we don’t realize how strong they are until our lives become something we didn’t ask for. In episode 26 of "From One Caregiver to Another," Kay Coughlin names some of...

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The story family caregivers are “supposed to” step into, even if they feel trapped by it

5 Things NOT To Do During 2020 Holidays

Given how high emotions are running, 2020 will be a great year to figure out how to stay close and connected during the holidays, even when you can’t do things the way you want. If you want to have a more peaceful and connected and less disappointing holiday season, here are five important things you can choose NOT to do this year. read the full post
5 Things NOT To Do During 2020 Holidays

J. Kay Coughlin, Leadership and Life Coach for Family Caregivers

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